Monday, August 26, 2013

Changes

I wouldn't say I'm one of those people who hate change. I've learned that change is good and ultimately you grow every time you choose to change for the better. A little discomfort, caused by change, is good for you. Going out of your comfort zone makes you a better person. And ultimately even if it's scary, changing because you're following the Spirit will always lead to great blessings in the future.

All of this being said, CHANGE IS THE WORST!
I don't want to go out of my comfort zone. I like comfort.  
Being a grown up is hard. I miss the times when all I worried about was if my mom was going to let me have dessert that night with my dinner.

In a week Fran and I are getting a U-Haul, hitching our cute sonata behind and driving 1,400 miles together to our new home for the next few years. Rexburg, ID.

I feel like a crazy person because there are reasons I'm so excited to start this adventure with my husband and there are reasons why I feel like I'm constantly having an anxiety attack about them.


These are my worries summed up really fast and kinda compressed into the craziness that I feel. Mainly I hate leaving people that I love. My family is my everything. Leaving my Parents and Cassie and my Grandma Jo and Pompa breaks my heart. And then to make it worse I have to leave John and Lainey the two kids I've absolutely fallen in love with and given my everything into loving them and helping them grow. 

I'm scared. And Anxious. And excited. 
But mostly I'm moving forward with Faith.

Fran and I have prayed and prayed and have felt like yes, the best thing for our little family is for us to move out to Rexburg, ID.  

The best way I can describe what I'm feeling is this quote from Lemony Snicket's Book "A Series of Unfortunate Events", 


"It is like walking up the stairs to your bedroom in the dark,
and thinking there is one more stair than there is.
Your foot falls down, through the air, and there is a sickly moment
of dark surprise as you try to readjust the way you thought of things."



I don't mean this to sound negative. Because I don't feel negative about all of this change. It's just change, a readjusting, in a way I didn't expect. 

 

So here's to moving forward with faith. And change.

3 comments:

  1. I'm excited for you two to move to school. I am the most upset that Jordan and I didn't have more time in school as a married couple. There is a lot of responsibility but there is still room for being young and irresponsible. Trust me, not being in school and floating to find your place as well as trying to find friends. It's really hard. You guys will be great. But if you two get pregnant before us, so help me...

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  2. Love this. I love that in VERY different circumstances we are both learning so much about how change is a good thing and challenges you and makes you into a better person. That said....I also love that it freaks us both out :)

    I can't wait till you're close though :)

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  3. ...You got this. I have no doubt that inside that spunky, energetic and peppy soul of yours lies the most courageous, brave and fiery girl ready to take on the world, if need be! I have never doubted your strength and you will do this HARD thing with grace ( under pressure) and with that beautiful smile of yours! I am just a text away but the best safety net is your knees.

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